Photo: After getting up at 04:15 and driving to London I was ‘ready’ for the start.

David: Who is planning to ride the Shark on Sunday?

Anon: I was but have decided I’m not fit enough unfortunately.

Paul: I am. I doubt I’ll ever be fit enough but I’m going anyway!

Colin: Me too

I was feeling somewhat nervous about this ride before this WhatsApp exchange. Paul is a stronger climber than me so if he wasn’t fit enough then what chance did I stand?

The Shark is a 200 km audax heading South from the Cutty Sark in Greenwich, over the North and South Downs to Seaford on the coast and back again on Sunday 12th March 2026. 200 km wasn’t the problem. It was the 3,361m of climbing along the way that was the issue. The constant ups and downs resemble the teeth a Great White, hence The Shark.

I began to question my choice just after the start as we climbed out of Greenwich up to Blackheath. Surrounded by several ICC clubmates I had to ride faster than I would normally do on a warm up climb.

I questioned my choice at 22 km when we hit the short but steep Cudham Hill. Out of the saddle and following others criss crossing the road to reduce the gradient. I was going so slowly I struggled to keep upright. I would find out why on the way back.

I questioned my choice for the next 10 km as we climbed up to Ide Hill for a short rest and the view South. We had managed 32 km in 2 hours, only slightly faster than the minimum speed for the audax.

I continued to question my judgement as we spent the next 2 hours either pointing upwards or downwards until the welcome respite of the first control at Chiddingly (79 km).

I’d met Ivor, the organiser of The Shark, in Italy during the Alpi4000 in 2022. He knew about my Italian connection so made sure there was some grated grana for the the very welcome minestrone.

“There’s always one”. I said to Geoff over lunch. It’s great to ride in a group but that means more time at the controls as there’s usually one rider who, just as we’re about to head off says “Sorry, I forgot to fill my water bottle” or “Sorry, I need to go to the toilet” or “Sorry….”. True to form, this time it was “Sorry, I’ve got a puncture.” I helped Tom replace his inner tube and we set off still on schedule.

I questioned my choice as we continued to battle the increasing headwind as we got closer to the coast.

I questioned my choice as we climbed up to High and Over. That climb followed the now established pattern of me arriving last at the summit. At least we could see the Channel in the distance.

I felt much better on arrival at Seaford (101 km), the half way point.

The group that I spent most of the time staring at their backsides

I felt better about my choice as we started the return leg with a tailwind that would help us from time to time. That was short lived as I began to struggle towards the Mayfield control (137 km). Grinding my way up to the control, others had already bought their food and had their receipt for the brevet card.

Re-fuelled I felt a lot better. Just as well. Toys Hill and Hogtrough Hill stood between us and the finish. I really did question my choice as we all crawled up the two climbs. At the limit of my heart rate and ability to turn the pedals I was slow. I felt drained after Toys Hill. Paul said that Hogtrough was “worse”.

He was right. A few riders starting walking up. I’m nothing if not stubborn. So far I’ve not walked up any climb I’ve ever done and I didn’t want to start now. It was hard. I really wondered what I was I doing.

With those two monsters behind us I was at least able to keep up with the rest to the finish. On the way I saw a sign on the right hand side of the road that explained the struggle on the way out:

This took us past Biggin Hill airfield. After that we fairly flew through Bromley and back to the Cutty Sark (206 km) 12 hours and 34 minutes after we left, nearly 2 hours under the limit.

There were three very welcome sights.

A big thank you to Ivor and his team of volunteers from Audax Club Hackney for a great event. My Shark badge means I can tick that one off the list.

My thanks to my clubmates David, Dominique, Geoff, Ian, John, Paul and Tom who were very patient waiting for me at the top of the climbs. As I never lost visual contact hopefully it wasn’t too bad for them.

The Shark bit some big lumps out of me but I survived.